Is this the worst column ever written?

No, because a) it’s not a column and b) it wasn’t written by Bill Kristol. But still, this is one awful, awful piece of writing.

To surmise: some schmuck from the LA Times encapsulates in only a few hundred words the most fucked up malignancy in journalism today: the unwillingness to call bullshit on government. Be it out of ignorance, laziness or fear of accusations of bias, journalists routinely display a shameful reticence to scrutinize government dispatches, preferring instead to feed them directly, verbatim or paraphrased, to their audience.

Said douche castigates CNN’s Anderson Cooper for having the gall to repeatedly call the repeated lies of the Egyptian government in recent weeks exactly what they are: lies. Demonstrably untrue statements. Said hack rips Cooper as looking to cash-in on the bloviating punditry of his more successful competitors at Fox News and MSNBC, because apparently a “real journalist’s” job is to act as little more than a stenographer (or, I suppose in Cooper’s case, a parrot) for the proclamations of the Ministry of Information.

Notice in the article that not once does said toolbag take issue with the factual accuracy in Cooper’s designation of what is a mistruth and what is not. No, the issue is that Cooper had the audacity to actually parse the statements of others and make assertions as to their factual validity or lack thereof.

And how fucking dare he? I mean, journalists have a good thing going nowadays: swallow up whatever’s fed to you and just vomit it back up all over your audience. By challenging what he’d been told, Anderson Cooper was jeopardizing the sweet gig all his peers have going on – you get enough people doing that and it won’t be too long before journalists are being held accountable for totally missing the boat on things like Saddam’s “yellowcake” and how Reagan “knew nothing” and all sorts of complicated stuff that it’d just be easier to take the people in charge’s word on.

No, preserve the status quo. There are no “lies” when it comes to hard news. Don’t rock the boat. Work makes freedom.

EDIT: As usual, Glenn Greenwald gets it even righter than I do. Whatever, Glenn. You may be smarter than me, and more well-spoken, and actually get paid, but I-

…nothin’. Dammit.